Dear Madison, Part 1

It’s been awhile since I’ve done a post on mommahood so I figured I’d try to loop it into today seeing as I had many smiles, many melt downs, and many cute moments these past few weeks with my boo. So let me talk about two questions that most parents must think about at one point or another……..

1. What are your joys of motherhood?

2. What do you miss the most about your “before” motherhood life?

Yes, then I get the dirty looks and scowls from some momma’s because “I’m not supposed to miss ANYTHING about my life before I had my child.” Well guess what…….I do. It doesn’t mean I don’t love you sweetheart, it doesn’t mean I wish to go back in life, it doesn’t even mean I have regrets! I’m human, I get tired, I get exhausted and I often think of what it used to be like before you came along. The responsibility that only included me, daddy, my job and our home. Now there is a whole other little person to worry and care for. I sometimes miss that, but if you think about it, it’s about the exhaustion. If I wasn’t exhausted everyday from raising you, teaching you right from wrong, caring for you, loving you, taking care of our home, making sure daddy is happy, then maybe I wouldn’t think of the “before” motherhood life.

I also laugh because of all of the things I didn’t know about being a mother, the things I had NO CLUE about, want me to name a few..ok I’ll name a few. Someday you too will see these things.

1. That exhaustion can cause one bitch of a momma.
2. That daddy and I will never be “daddy and I” EVER again.
3. Feeling insane is a pretty normal feeling for any mother.
4. Staying home vs. going to work……….way harder than any job I’ve EVER had. It is a job.
5. Seeing my baby boo smile, can bring a tear to my eye any day of the week, any hour of the day or any minute of an hour.
6. When I left the house the day I gave birth, my home would never be the same again.

 

Well that leads me back to the first question I asked. I can’t pick just one that I love about motherhood, their are too many to choose one. So I’ll name my favorites. The ones that make me melt inside every time I see it, hear it or look back on a picture of it.

1. When you were able to prop yourself up……just something that meant so much to me!

2. When you were able to concentrate on something, when you just wanted to learn so much so soon!

3. Seeing you with your great grandmothers……here is G-Mem, you were only 7 mths old when we lost her but boy oh boy did she love you hunny.

4. You always did love to eat, from day one. Sorry, you get that from mommy.

5. Mommy always made sure you supported the Boston teams.

6. I don’t like pictures, I hate being in them, I look terrible in every single one, I look 20 lbs heavier in every single one….but this one, is one of my favorites.

7.  Can you believe their was a time where you let momma walk! Yes you slept, I walked 🙂

8. Or how about when you were actually a good girl food shopping. We got stopped by every woman in the store because you were so gosh darn cute.

9. And yes lots of times with Nana, but specifically this one because you sat in your seat at the end of a long weekend up the camp and literally was falling asleep sitting up…….

10. You used to help mommy do the laundry, it was one of your favorite things to do!! Seriously!! Still (at 21 mths I write this)

11. YES I loved when you could hold your bottle youself………but now……..I actually miss it.

12. Of course when you first started walking…..I loved the wobbly stage!

13. Any time you are sleeping makes me melt…..it’s when I realize just how damn lucky I am to have you.

14. You loved the vineyard where mommy & daddy got married…..we go every summer, this is your second summer there.

15.  Of course times with daddy, something about seeing you with your father that always makes the warm fuzzies come out.

16. And then their is TT, she adores you, always wants to be with you, so remember that when you get older. Always want to be with her. Trust me. Sisters are the best.

17. This one is my new favorite……it’s of you and daddy your second summer at the camp…..it reminded me of me and my daddy.

So always remember my boo, no matter how many hard times we have, we have a gazzillion more good ones. Some day when you become a mother I will be their for you as mine was their for me to help you every step of the way, to help you through the tough times, and cry with you through the happy times….I love you more than anything Madison.

Love,

Mommy

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